Being a parent can be challenging, rewarding, and complicated, but we love unconditionally. Sadly, family programs and services sometimes tend to forget or ignore step-parents. Step-parents make the choice to love, take care and be there, even when they may not have to. If you agree that family is not simply defined by blood but by commitment and by love, please join us virtually on the evening of Wednesday, February 17th, to connect with other step-moms and step-dads as we support and draw inspiration from one another. We will discuss everything from the role of a step-parent and undefined limits to its difficulties and rewards.
Registration required, but first…
Prior to our first get together, please read and reflect on the thoughtful words below from Jayanna Pleau, our step-parent host.
« When I grow up, I want to be a step-parent, » said no one, ever…
Mothers and fathers are praised for raising children, even celebrated. Mothers are even nicknamed « super moms. » During their careers and in their daily lives, protection, support, guidance, pride and love are expected from moms and dads towards their biological children. Yet, behind the shadows of these « super parents, » the same expectations are often held of step-parents towards another’s children. « Super moms » may get through parenthood with the help of unconditional love, but truth be told, step-parents sometimes have to resort to sheer will to get through their new lifestyle.
Standing tall, hands-on-hips, cape-in-wind, biological mothers are praised for raising children, and supported when the going gets tough. Invisible cape in the wind, step-parents are reminded of their choice should a burnout happen.
Between biological parents, there are various styles of discipline and chosen responsibilities. Step-parents continuously juggle anger, regret, happiness, content and guilt, and at times with unwanted sealed mouths, because final decisions are not our final decisions to make. Step-parents live lives that aren’t fully ours, yet people may remind us it was our choice.
Honestly, step-parenting is about changing your life for another’s children. It’s about constantly wondering where your limits are. It’s about taboo regrets, hushed thoughts, and guilty pleasures of replacing the biological parent half the time. It’s about waking up at night, dealing with tantrums, disciplining, spending time with someone else’s child, and wondering you can handle it, if it’s all worth it. It’s about being brave.
All good parenting requires love and care, but not DNA. The fine print for parenthood reads making children a priority. Parenthood is about teaching children valuable lessons and guiding them through life. It’s also about putting on a brave face that children are always safe with their parents.
Bravery is great, but unconditional love is simply the best. Loving your own child is easy; loving another parent’s child as your own is what makes step-parents really special.
We invite all super step-moms and super step-dads to join the club. Step-parents, stand tall, put your hands on your hips and let your cape flow in the wind.
I look forward to meeting you on Zoom on February 17th.